![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sapphire, why are you running? there's nothing in this house that deserves that kind of hustle.
professor kari: you gotta stop running in the house. that's how i died.
sapphire: i thought you died giving grandpa jasper a "massage".
professor kari: yeah, but i wouldn't've been so damn tired if i hadn't run to get there. when you're old, go time is go time.
jasper: no comment.
this sim is pretty. i wish any of the bakelites would've listened to me and met her. jasper aggressively canceled it out of his queue.
sapphire: these butterflies are dead. they better stop freeloading in my dang jar.
GET OUT OF THERE. who knows how much bitch warlock and zombie professor dna is in that water.
cynthia, i would never ask you to stay the night. you are my enemy and the enemy of all bakelites.
you farted on turquoise, and i will never forgive you.
why will no one play chess with jasreen. that's so rude... i say, as i take this picture of the back of her head.
turquoise: i know we're clones, and you're not supposed to touch your clone, but...
lapis: what is going on and who are you?
jasper, why do you spend so much time in generation 5's bedrooms?
jasper: no one comes in here. i like having some alone time.
amillia: i wonder if, at my age, i could still fulfill my dream of being struck by lightning?
knowledge sims are a wild ride.
professor kari: this isn't my type of art. too cluttered.
jasper: can you get the fuck out? i'm hiding.
peridot is constantly followed and harassed by her offspring. i feel like this is her fault for not going full "hamster that eats its own babies" early on like has
aquamarine: what even is your relationship to us? are you like... our uncle?
jasreen: that makes no sense, i'm not your uncle. i'm your great, great half-uncle. learn the difference.
lapis: i require attention and mom locked me out of the bathroom.
lapis tickle cam. has vr gone too far?
shit, he's back in there. just in the other bed this time.
aquamarine: yeah! i did it! thanks, great, great half-uncle jasreen!
jasreen: I BELIEVE IN ALL MY NIBLINGS-TWICE-REMOVED. THEY CAN DO IT.
lapis, why have you gravitated to the trash? who left this trash here? what is happening in this family?
amillia masters cooking. furby friend is passively proud of her.
wow, girl, what are your eyelids? they're like, fully heart-shaped. that's not normal.
aquamarine: I'M GROWING UP. I'M GOING TO BE SO HANDSOME.
well goddamn, this girl was right.
lapis is growing up too, on the porch, near the trash pile. soon, she will also be a beautiful sunflower.
this isn't ts3 or ts4, but apparently she grew up with the "hates sunflowers" trait. or "hates trash" trait. which would mean she can no longer be a bakelite.
opal's also growing up, and she looks like she's doing the pose from the original megaman cover and i can't get over it.
turquoise: i don't want to do the dishes.
beryl: me neither!
turquoise: let's rock-paper-scissors for it.
beryl: let's rock-paper-scissors for who has to go tell jasper to do it.
i really like aquamarine's face. it's the opposite combination of her parents to turquoise, and both results are interesting.
as is tradition, i photographed opal several minutes after she aged up. i like her face.
her personality, on the other hand, is a lot to deal with. generation 5 is very active.
jasper might be having a midlife crisis, which is mistimed, as this bitch is probably going to live forever. how would you know where the middle even is.
banjo: i don't particularly care for your fashion choices.
jasper: i didn't get a cat to be constantly judged.
what a perfect time to garden. in the dead of night.
jasper: the dead of night is the perfect time to do many different things.
no, jasper, you cannot be a spy. stop rolling this want.
i will make him weird outfits though, hopefully that will suffice.
beryl bakelite is soft pastel aesthetic goals.
turquoise: and then he says, "how do you think i rang the doorbell?"
aquamarine: that joke is gross and you're gross. minus minus.
turquoise: feh, you don't understand comedy.
aquamarine: talking to this hoe is like talking to a wall.
aquamarine: look at that hot lady. she would fuck the hell out of a unicorn centaur. a sexy, hot unicorn centaur with rainbow chest hair... what? here? at this magical stable? but what if pa-pa sees us?
jasper: the mass industrialization of earth is one of the reasons my mother left it.
professor kari: thank god tiberius is a merciful planet lord.
jasreen: hi.
jasper: don't acknowledge me. don't even look at me. cut the jas out of your name. you're just reen now.
jasreen: you know what? same. you're just per now.
video games is truly the only bonding experience these dudes participate in with family. everything else goes hilariously awry.
ts2's facial animations are sometimes confused by generation 5, and very confused by jasreen.
jasper: i'm still pretty good!
professor kari: yeah! absolutely! *winks at the camera* (this motherfucker is not good at all.)
jasper: i can hear you when you whisper, idiot.
is there a connection between the bubble blower and decreased intelligence in bakelites? probably not. i think every generation since jasper has been smarter.
there's two generations of bakelites on this couch.
and jasreen and beryl are from the same one, technically.
well, grandma barnacle is stealing their paper, again, apparently because of opal. what opal did to this old lady, i'll never know.
lapis: i can't play the piano with all this tomfoolery going on behind me.
rondie's making progress. it's slow progress, but i'm still proud.
i might overuse these trampolines, but look at them. look how cute they are.
we don't talk about the fact that the ceiling lamp in the back right is broken. there's a gap between it and the ceiling and i don't know why. it hasn't always done that.
rondie: i love the thought of mastering skills. would love to do it one day.
aquamarine: dad, aren't you old? how haven't you mastered one already?
rondie: i didn't ask to be interrogated.
jasper: sometimes i wish you were a transformer who could change into a hotter bitch.
professor kari: you're getting the peg tonight.
jasreen: i'm like an elephant. i never forget.
sapphire: thanks for sharing, nerd.
jasreen: i'll never forget you said that. or forgive.
lapis: oh no, you killed me. i'm gonna have to haunt you now. forever.
opal: bring it on, ectoplasmic dorkus.
lapis: with ghost tickles!
opal: absolutely not. this is a gross violation of trust between a ghost and the person they haunt.
oh, this still happens a lot. i just feel like i took enough pictures of it in generation 2.
banjo can never die.
i say, in this update, probably four or five updates before i forget to refill this dish and banjo accidentally dies.
professor kari: you know those pink heels you have? fuck em.
jasper: HOW DARE YOU.
man, amillia dies right after work. she didn't even get to pop a brewski and watch the game.
grim reaper: they have tv in hell.
amillia: why am i going to hell?
grim reaper: look, man, it's not that bad. heaven is boring.
beryl ran... but she didn't quite get there in time. i'm so sad. power walk faster next time your wife is dying.
we got a bakelite traffic jam. i repeat, bakelite traffic jam on the front porch.
all these bitches gotta mourn amillia at once.
professor kari: death turns me on.
jasper: i wish it worked for me, you'd be a boner magnet.
jasper: indeed, i am a viciously evil warlock, slayer of germs, fucker of zombie professor-scientists, beginner of the ultimate undoing.
i guess they wanted amillia to feel included?
me: sobs into hands at the empty side of the bed.
aquamarine: you don't make omelettes right. mom does it better.
turquoise: shshshshshut up.
beryl still has her cat, which is good. but man, when beryl dies, that cat's just gonna have jasper and that's rough.
what a great thing to pass by while going to school. a scenic trip past the tombstone.
professor kari: man, jasper's mom was hot. what even happened with his face?
amillia gets put on a little memorial table, awaiting her wife's urn so that i can decorate without having to move shit around later.
beryl: why do i even play chess with you? last time rondie won you tried to tabula rasa him.
jasper: that probably would've happened anyways. one day i'm just gonna wipe his memories and dump him in a cornfield and see what happens.
even jasreen is doing well in school and no one helps this girl with shit.
jasper: god, it's like someone is stabbing me in the ears with knives made from the sound that fingernails on a chalkboard makes!
jasreen: well, that's harsh.
how the christ did this happen, you have ten cooking points.
jasper: get rid of the sprinklers, i'd rather be on fire than have to dry my hair.
looks like it's lobster of the void tonight. again.
aquamarine: math is hard.
sapphire: not if you're smart.
jasreen: wow, burn.
sapphire: these peons have even seen my final intellectual form.
peridot: hey, rondie, our daughter is growing up, do you think you could--
rondie: seen ✓
thanks, default that i didn't know was broken. for the nightmares.
after removing her hannibal lector cloak, sapphire is looking pretty good.
rondie has the best work outfit i've ever seen. he's just a normal dude bro until work and then he puts on this dress.
after many sim years of trying, peridot seems to have made friends with banjo. someone else needed to.
i would say it's an heir thing, but i don't have hopes for generation 5 keeping the tradition going.
aquamarine: MOM I AM A+ GET
peridot: *hello darkness my old friend*
teenage entrepreneurs really don't get any respect. seriously, this is the carpool for how high turquoise is on the ladder. ffs.
aquamarine: yes! this hair is better. better for ensnaring unicorn centaurs.
i don't even know what a unicorn centaur is, but i support you.
hey, jasreen. teeth don't go there.
turquoise: this is bullshit, i gotta do homework? i got a damn 9 to 5, ain't no one got time for this.
peridot: hey, sapphire, look, it's the ghost of ada lovelace.
sapphire: WHAT WHERE?
peridot: PSYCHE!
sapphire: you couldn't even let me take my glasses off first? thanks, mom.
amillia still hangs out. mainly in the kitchen and her and beryl's bedroom.
you might be concerned for banjo, but don't be. she's very functional as a sim cat.
i would ask questions about jasreen's pose, but it is strangely in-character.
beryl: i have everything i ever wanted. grandbabies.
you're a fortune sim.
beryl: grandbabies sell for a lot by the pound.
beryl doesn't discriminate on tucking children in. she even does her half-sister monster.
jasreen: spaceships!
sapphire: what, because i'm smart i gotta be into star trek and battlestar galactica? pssh. that's only a coincidence.
i might've had sapphire do a couple of aquamarine's assignments. it's fine.
this face is borderline unacceptable. there's just something worse about there being a nose involved.
matchmaker: i'm sneaking, bitch.
aquamarine: i see nothing amiss here! such a master of stealth has escaped my vision completely!
i love pooklet's matchmaker default (for obvious reasons involving the dismantling of racial stereotypes) but i can't pretend it isn't kind of scary for a butch elder woman in a full fucking suit to randomly sneak onto your lot sometimes.
i don't NEED these, why do i get so many? i'm so angry, why can't you give one of these to regine or someone who needs them?
jasper: i swear to god, i'm going to master logic and then i'll be the world's smartest warlock and you'll think my brain is hot.
professor kari: i believe in you, dear.
aquamarine: *screams* MOM I GOT AN A.
peridot: war... war never changes.
i want to say this is like. 6/10. but tbh i can't remember which skills jasper has mastered, or how many skills ts2 has at all.
that info leaves my brain as soon as i close the game.
sorbet: hmph! you're just as much of a nerd as you were in high school.
peridot: fuck you, teenage demon who exists only to torment bakelites!
professor kari: i should give that girl the zombie kiss of death.
opal: professor kari should give sorbet the zombie kiss of death.
jasreen: hey, i'm growing up! guys? ...guys? bikini-clad stranger? ...sister?
beryl: i'm busy.
jasreen aged up! that really is just her face, huh? this is the neutral position.
jasreen: i wish i had best friends. :<
have you tried clothes?
jasreen: what talk of madness...?
opal: i could take you to the alps and make it look like you died in skiing accident.
sapphire: that'll be hard for you to do when you're already dead from a skiing accident.
opal: hey, real quick, a question. what actually is skiing?
sapphire: i don't know, opal, we're sims and can't actually do that. i just know you do it in the alps.
opal: you find strangers there, too.
i'm glad i brought that picture of banjo from the old house. it sums up the bakelite attitude.
peridot and rondie were six days apart in age, so i evened them back out.
luc: what did i say, son? about where the light touches being our kingdom and to never go to that dark spot on the edge?
elliott: but dad, i wanna be in the legacy. :<
luc: SIMBA, NO.
i don't know how many of you have seen monkeybone, because it's a terrible movie, but my zombie skin always makes me think of the scene where chris kattan is throwing his organs at people.
nooooooooo ;~; not my baby.
amillia is even waiting for her. THAT MAKES IT BETTER BUT ALSO WORSE.
jade doesn't even get on the dialogue box but malachite does? i see how it is.
banjo is so upset!
SOMEONE HELP HER ;~;
beryl goes in the death nook, to be with amillia and a nice flower arrangement.
sometimes banjo has to sprint all the way across the house to hiss at jasreen, and honestly, that's a mood.
aquamarine masters the body skill, and i'm proud.
sapphire: i look especially fab today, but i'm not a my little pony hoe like aquamarine.
aquamarine: UNICORN CENTAURS AREN'T PONIES.
sapphire: also, fuck the police.
i might be a little in love with sapphire.
turquoise climbed to the top of the ladder, just in time for me to start sending everyone off to college.
but first, opal and lapis had birthdays! opal's look has done a complete 180 into a flowery goth princess deal.
lapis is just.... uh. lapis. her shirt has trees on it.
being the oldest, turquoise is sent off first.
and also being the oldest, she had time to gather more scholarships. which i appreciate.
aquamarine goes next, as is her place in the line.
sapphire: I HAVE TO SAY GOODBYE. AQUAMARINE, WAIT.
you're literally going to see her in fifteen seconds when i also send you to the university ether. calm your tits.
bye-bye, sapphire, at least i know you'll do well. you're knowledge.
everyone managed to get at least one scholarship (usually the logic one), but jasreen had to be unique.
then again, she is jasreen.
jasreen going to college like this is a very jasreen thing to do.
opal's the last one off to college. guess it's time to end the update!
who knows if lapis even went, i forgot to take a picture. see if lapis is there on the next exciting update of keeping up with the bastards.
tags:
From: (Anonymous)
no subject
From:
no subject
From: (Anonymous)
no subject
From:
no subject